Quick Quips and Quotes Presents... Points To Ponder
*Is it good if a vacuum really sucks? *If a word were misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know? *If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words? *Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack? *Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing? *Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing? *Why do 'tug' boats push their barges? *Why are they called "stands" when they are made for sitting? *Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"? *Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected? *Why are 'wise man' and 'wise guy' opposites? *Why do 'overlook' and 'oversee' mean opposite things? *Why is phonics not spelled the way it sound? *If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it? *If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting? *If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? *If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right? *Why is bra singular and panties plural? *Why do you press harder
on the buttons of a remote control *Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase? *Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them? *Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle? *Why do they call it a TV set, when you only get one? *How come wrong numbers are never busy? *Do people in Australia call the rest of the world "up over"? *Does that screwdriver belong to Philip? *Can a stupid person be a smart-ass? *Does killing time damage eternity? *Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard? *Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips? *Why is it that nightfall's but daybreaks? *Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand? *Why is it that when you're
driving and looking for an address, **Why is lemon juice made with artificial
flavor, *Are part-time bandleaders semiconductors? *Can you buy an entire chess set in a pawnshop? *Daylight savings time - why are they saving it and where do they keep it? *Did Noah keep his bees in archives? *Do jellyfish get gas from eating jellybeans? *Do pilots take crash-courses? *Do stars clean themselves with meteor showers? *Do you think that when they asked George
Washington for *Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations? *Have you ever seen a toad on a toadstool? *How can there be self-help "groups"? *How do you get off a nonstop flight? *How do you write zero in Roman numerals? *How many weeks are there in a light year? *If a jogger runs at the speed of sound, can he still hear his Walkman? *If athletes get athlete's foot, do astronauts get mistletoe? *If Barb's so popular, why do you have to buy all her friends? *If cats and dogs didn't have fur would we still pet them? *If peanut butter cookies
are made from peanut butter, *If space is a vacuum, who changes the bags? *If swimming is good for
your shape, then why do the *If tin whistles are made out of tin, what do they make fog horns out of? *If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi? *If you can't drink and drive, why do bars have parking lots? *If you jog backwards, will you gain weight? *Why do they call it "chili" if it's hot? *Why do we sing "Take
me out to the ball game" *Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
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